Die, Ikugay!
by Completely Romance-Addicted
Summary: Who's sick of Tadase-bashing? I am, and I want to show these Tadase-bashers what they're doing and how immature they are. Crack-fic. Warning: Reading this will make you want to claw your eyes out. Rated T, but there are mentions of sex.


**A/N: It's really strange how some people don't like Tadase-bashing, yet they never do anything about it but write something like this on their profile: "amg noo bassing tadasekun tadasekun cutte!111!11" No, I'm going to do actually something about this, and I honestly don't care if to "do something about this" I have to lower myself down to your level. I'm willing to act stupid and immature to show you guys how stupid and immature YOU'RE acting. So don't try to tell me that I'm doing the exact same thing as you guys, because yes, I am. And I'm proud of it.**

**I also don't give a fuck whether I turn half the Shugo Chara fan population against me by writing this.**

**Almost all Amuto fans bash Tadase. I won't automatically hate you because you support Amuto; you could be one of the sensible ones who don't. In fact, I myself am in love with Amuto... but you don't get to lecture me, Tadamu fans, because I'm doing this for you. Actually, I'm doing this for Tadase, because he's my fifth-favorite character, but whatever. Anyway, the point is that 97% of Amuto fans call Tadase "Tadagay," not knowing what the word "gay" means.**

**This was written purely to anger that 97%, and amuse the ones with enough sense to know I'm not bashing Ikuto. Okay, fine, I am. I admit that much. But I don't hate him; he's my third-favorite character. He's selfless, and is willing to do practically anything for the people he loves. So… yes, I like him. A lot. (No, I do not want to marry him, and no, I do not daydream daily about him and me making out in the park. Unlike some certain authors I can name.) Yes, I am bashing him for the sake of making a point. Besides… Tadase deserves this. ANYWAY (I get off-track so much), the point is that this was written for amusement for people like me, not just to be a total bitch.**

**If you want to complain about this in a review using illiterate chat-speak, I will not even bother to read it.**

**If you want to complain about this in a review using proper grammar, spelling, capitalization, and spacing, I promise I will read it and reply. Someday. When I feel like it. But not even someone who types normally can convince me Tadase deserves what he's going through right now.**

**Happy reading!~**

amuchan n tadasekun wure ahn a daet n it wuz beeutfull n awsum

n ikugay wuz in a tree cuz hes a stallkuh n hes n hes IKU**_GAY_** LOLOLOLOLOL hahaha cuz hes gay get it cuz hes ikugay!1111!1111!1 n hes gay evn tho he likes amuchan it doesnt matter!111!1111!1 LOLOLOL

n when he saw amuchan he wuz like omg shes so pritty n awsum n stuff evn tho im supoze 2 B gay but whatev n he wuz falin in luv n stuff n he wuz so ovacum **(A/N: OMG I USE BIG WURD EVN THO I THNIK I SPELLD IT RONG)** tat he startd 2 pee n poo in his panties n da wurld wuz fluding w/diarea **(A/N: OMG I USE BIG WURD EVN THO I THNIK I SPELLD IT RONG)** n it wuz steenki

n then he jupmed doun n amuchan n tadasekun saw n amuchan wuz like omg ohno n hid B-hind tadasekun

n ikugay sed i luv u amuchan have sex w/me n tadasekun said no how darr u n tadasekun sed kiseki chara change gimme the holy crowny thingamajig

but then kiseki wuz havin sex w/ran miki n su al ov tem THREESOME

n then kiseki pulled his thingamajig out of their thingamajigs n sed ok sure n tadasekun chara changed n blasted ikugay

n then ikugay wuz on the dirt n tadasekun punched ikugay n ikugay was criing n sed ohno u messd upp mah pritty fase

n then tadasekun wuz like ohhohohohohoho i think ur fase luks bettah dis wai

n then ikugay wuz like sobsobsobsob ohno tadasekuns goenna keel meeeeeee helppppp butt no budy wud helppppp hm cuz hes ikugay n evry1 haets ikugay

n ikugay wuz stoopiid n pooing n faating

n tadasekun wuz like ohohohohohohohohoh **(A/N: I TINK IM TIRAD NAO BUTT DA OHOHO WUZ WAAAAAI LONGA)** its ur falt 4 comin nea mah amuchan

n amuchan wuz like yea ikugay ur gay no budy like u

n ikugay wuz like n died

n tadasekun wuz like hahahahahahahahaha

n amuchan wuz like tadasekun my luv n kised n huged him n dey maryed n livd hapy eva afta

n ikugay drownd in da diarea omg i use big wurd

da end

**Sigh. I think I'll make a series of crack-fics out of this. This one was more humorous and plain stupid, but the next one (if I ever get down to writing it) will be more serious and... um... Ikuto-bashy. Anyway... I'm looking forward to see how you people will react. Bye! ;)**


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